"I'll love you forever, You live in me. I will be great for you."
16
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Mikael
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44 posts
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Dauntless
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Post by Colton A. Diggs on Apr 17, 2014 17:11:03 GMT -5
Now Diggs knew he could be sarcastic, but for the most part he took everything seriously. At home it was seen as typical, and here he was seen as being at fault for it. But this girl took nothing lightly, jesus christ laugh. He couldn't help but feel his smile grow as she responded, with what sounds like her last efforts it was so forced. He sighed to himself, breaking the eye contact they had made. He leaned back and tuned out the doctor as she stitched him up. He knew she would only tell him to stay still so he did, as still as a statue. Letting his mind wander over the past few days, it wasnt something he did often anymore but it was important to know what was happening around him. What the importance of everything was.
He started back just two days, not daring to think back to the day of the Choosing Ceremony, to that roof. He stopped his train of thought and thought instead on the second day of training. They had spent the morning with their instructors, and there were a bunch of them. They had worked with the throwing knives and their basic fighting skills. Each of them had their first fight and he had dominated one of his fellow Erudite transfers. God did it feel good to beat the shit out of that punk Evans, still wearing his douchey little Erudite glasses. He scowled at thought of Parker Evans, one of the famous Erudite Evans. Their father was practically Head of Erudite and Parker's eldest sister would surely follow him, though the family was shaken by Parker and his twin sister Allison choosing Dauntless. Diggs had thought nothing of it, just as he had thought about nothing but pummeling the little punk during their fight. He knew he had put a real hurting to him, and Parker had spent a few hours in here himself. The memory put a grin on his face and it seemed to concern the doctor.
He could feel the needle going in and out, soon enough it was closed and clean. She gave him his serum and medicine and he took them quickly, but he could feel a burning sensation in his throat. He knew he was going to regret that. But he could also see her out of the side of his eye, just barely making out her body on the bed next to his. He scooted back to the corner of the bed and leaned back, looking straight into the ceiling. "Can I ask you something sweetheart?" The doctor had left them, so they were alone in the room. "What's your problem with transfers?" He had a lot more he wanted to say but as she so often pointed out, he was a man of few words and this situation was no different.
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You spend hours, days, weeks, months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together.
16
years old
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Straight
Single
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Dauntless-Born Initiate
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Quinn
is Offline
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48 posts
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Dauntless
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Post by Payton G. McHale on Apr 21, 2014 10:19:35 GMT -5
Without the doctors, the room was quiet, only the sound of the fan overhead circulating the air around them in tight circles. Payton could feel the gentle breeze on her forehead, which was beginning to feel a little hot and light from the pain medication that she had just taken. Maybe she should have sipped even slower, she knew the dangers of taking it too quickly. Closing her eyes tightly, she tried to slow the spinning of the world with a few deep breaths. At least she couldn’t feel the pain in her knee any longer - it had become a gentle throbbing that she was barely attuned to. So much better than before.
“Can I ask you something sweetheart?”
“Nope.” Payton said, still staring up into the ceiling and watching as the fan turned in tight circles. She didn’t want to talk to him, it only furthered her confusion about the whole situation. Perhaps what she had realized throughout this whole trip was that he wasn’t so bad...well, transfers weren’t so bad. But that wasn’t something she would ever admit to herself, so she pursed her lips and turned over slightly so she was staring at him. He probably wanted to know why she hated him so much, “Fine. One question.” She muttered and then waited for it.
“What’s your problem with transfers?”
Yep. Almost entirely as Payton had been expecting. She wasn’t sure that she wanted to answer...especially after what had happened today, but she knew that he was expecting her to, plus she had said he could have one question. There was a silence that sat between them for a few seconds before Payton opened her mouth, “It’s unnatural. You’re born into a faction, grow up with those ideals, so it only makes logical sense that you should be most attuned to those ideals.” She looked over at him again, locking eyes with him as she tried to explain. She didn’t feel the need to justify, she felt the way that she felt and that was that. She would always be prejudiced against those who invaded her faction, “But by moving into a different faction you’re disrupting the general flow of things, you’re bringing superiority of intelligence into a society that’s based on courageousness. It doesn’t make sense. It’s just unnatural,” She turned over so she was staring at the ceiling and shaking her head upon the pillow, “You’re unnatural, Mute.”
She wanted to ask him her own questions - figure out if he felt responsible for that dead girl...because it sure seemed like something was constantly up his ass. But she didn’t. Payton just stared at the ceiling, trying to figure out how the hell she had ended up in the infirmary talking logistics with a Transfer.
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"I'll love you forever, You live in me. I will be great for you."
16
years old
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Straight
Single
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Initiate
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Mikael
is Offline
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44 posts
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Dauntless
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Post by Colton A. Diggs on Apr 21, 2014 22:28:11 GMT -5
Diggs took a breath and then blew out again, quite audibly. But with the rumbling of the fan, there was little chance it could be heard by Payton from the next bed over. He wanted his question answered so he decided to ask her if he could ask a question. He was going to ask regardless of her response, it was rhetorical but it still made him grin that she said no. He turned and looked at her, even as she continued to stare at the ceiling. Then she slowly turned, staring right at him. Her face filled with disgust and he came very close to laughing.
Then he asked her, no emotion involved, just pure question and answer. He wanted to know why she had it out for him and every other transfer, not that he minded really, but his curiosity got the best of him. That’s when she began speaking and he wished he could take it back. He felt his pulse rising, anger driving through his veins and he knew that he couldn’t let her see it.
On and on she went, until finally she stopped, pausing before she turned back away from him, facing the ceiling again. He got his breathing under control and then he lost it, he began laughing. Slow at first and then louder and longer. He turned back up to the ceiling and quite literally slapped his knees. Laughing was pretty much his only defense from getting up and stabbing her again. He finally stopped laughing and swung his feet off the bed. “Are you really that thick? I’m not divergent you idiot. I’m courageous, always have been and ive been stuck in a world based on intelligence. I’ve spent my entire life, getting knowledge jammed down my throat, knowing I don’t belong. You have no idea what its like to grow up in a place where you aren’t wanted or belong. I wish I could be intelligent and yearn for knowledge but I don’t.” He finally took a breath, he had just spoken more words in the last sixteen seconds then the entire time he had been in Dauntless up until this point. He took a breath and then continued, faster and louder. “We are ALL unnatural. We rely on one aspect of life to make our decisions and decide who we are. We should be striving to be as many different factions as we can. Striving to be Divergent.” He shook his head, and then leaned back onto his pillow.
He blinked away the anger and tried to relax, he wanted to hurt her. But it seemed like something he could take care of somewhere else, another time. He decided that something needed to be evened out, he didn’t like owing her things or leaving a score unsettled, especially with her. “Ask your question” She didn’t say that she had one and he wasn’t sure what she would ask but it kept them from being on different levels and he knew she could think of one.
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You spend hours, days, weeks, months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together.
16
years old
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Straight
Single
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Dauntless-Born Initiate
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Quinn
is Offline
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48 posts
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Dauntless
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Post by Payton G. McHale on Apr 21, 2014 23:27:32 GMT -5
Payton watched the circles of the fan again, trying her best to tune out the inevitable feeling that he was still staring at her. She refused to turn back over though and look at him - she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. He had wanted to know the answer to his question and she had given it to him: plain and simple. There was no reason for her to care what he thought about her own personal opinions. That was when she heard it; the eerie sound of laughter coming from the other bed. She felt the confusion rising, accompanied by annoyance. Was he honestly laughing at her? “Seriously?” She immediately turned over, only to catch him practically buckled over and swinging his feet off the side of the bed. She herself sat up, her own brain swimming with the serum that she had taken; she felt slightly light-headed.
Divergent. She hated that word. Or maybe she was afraid of it. People weren’t supposed to talk about it in all honesty - it was like a taboo phrase in society. Of course she didn’t think that he was divergent, just...a fish out of water in Dauntless. He was born an Erudite, that was where he was supposed to stay.
She lost his voice when he started talking about not belonging. How many times had she felt the same way? How many times had she tried forcing herself into a mold she was fairly certain she didn’t belong in at all? Payton immediately bit down on her lip, trying her hardest to stop herself from saying anything else about it. She didn’t want to be like him....he was a Transfer in a few faction....this was her home. This was where she had to belong. She had no choice. Her beliefs put her into Dauntless. She belonged. She had to belong.....right? There she sat, with her mouth hanging open ever so slightly as she stared at the guy she had thought couldn’t speak for the first two days of Initiation who had practically just given her an inner monologue that he had obviously been saving up for.
He leaned back after demanding that they strive for divergence and she felt her brow furrow even deeper, “Don’t be an idiot. That...that thing is dangerous to even talk about.” Payton growled, knowing the rumors that surrounded the divergents. Factions didn’t like them...they saw them as threats. They were hard to find though...normally in hiding or something like that. Whatever, if Diggs wanted to go be like that and get himself killed then he could be her guest. Payton on the other had was going to do her best to make sure that she actually survived in Dauntless.
“Ask your question.”
She looked up from her hands and stared at him as he watched the fan. They had switched roles almost instantaneously, “Who was she.” She knew that was what she wanted to know, she hadn’t even needed to think about the question, it had just slipped out of her lips before she had a chance to really think about it. Well...at least she would get some of the answers that she needed...maybe she could even find a pressure point of her own.
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"I'll love you forever, You live in me. I will be great for you."
16
years old
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Straight
Single
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Initiate
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Mikael
is Offline
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44 posts
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Dauntless
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Post by Colton A. Diggs on Apr 22, 2014 0:12:26 GMT -5
After all that he had said all she could say was that he shouldn’t talk about Divergents, literally all she had to say. People were so afraid of the word, of the people who indeed were Divergent. He found it to be beyond ridiculous, he knew why they were considered dangerous, hell he grew up in Erudite who were pretty much known to be Divergent hunters. The faction leaders disliked anything or anyone that kept them from being able to control the people inside the fence. They wanted to be able to keep their people on a leash and Divergents fought that way of life, they didn’t fit a faction and Diggs couldn’t help but agree with those ideals.
But that wasn’t the only thing that he had caught, she had bit her lip when he spoke about growing up in the wrong faction. Could she have tested for another faction? Was her childhood the only thing keeping her inside the top ten and alive in the first round. He thought back to their fight and the amount of times she seemed to be anticipating his next move, overthinking every detail. Maybe she wasn’t supposed to be Dauntless, maybe that’s why she hated transfers because if it wasn’t for her beliefs she would have left Dauntless. Maybe she was even Erudite. Or rather supposed to be.
When he said Divergent again it seemed to hit her again and he was annoyed. “Maybe it is dangerous. But don’t you ever wish we were more than one thing. Don’t you wish you could be brave and honest. Smart or selfless or intelligent. Any combination would be better than this sad existence.” That was the biggest reason why he didn’t mind living in any faction like he told Abby he would do. He loved the idea of being brave but in the end he wanted them all. In small pieces, in some cases and much larger in others.
He heard her question and he smirked. Though it didn’t last long, because his mind began going through all the things that reminded him of her. He loved her and missed her with every bone in her body. He coughed into his hand and shook off the remaining cloudiness from the medicine. “Abigail Calderone. Daughter of the top doctor in Erudite. The love of my life.” He spoke evenly and with conviction. He had answered her question and that was what she deserved, no more, no less.
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You spend hours, days, weeks, months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together.
16
years old
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Straight
Single
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Dauntless-Born Initiate
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Quinn
is Offline
|
48 posts
|
Dauntless
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Post by Payton G. McHale on Apr 22, 2014 13:07:39 GMT -5
Sad existence? Did Mute honestly believe that all they lived was a sad existence? Surely he couldn’t mean that. She could feel her palms sweating as she pressed them into the thermal bedding of the infirmary’s bed. They weren’t sad - they were logical. They were trying to prevent another war breaking out on their hands. With Diggs at the helm, they would all be fighting each other in matter of minutes. If people didn’t have an ethical code to abide by - an ethical code of their faction to which they belonged - whose to say all hell wouldn’t break loose. Payton chewed on her bottom lip, willing herself not to call him an idiot for the way that he thought - but that’s what it was. It was stupidity and ignorance.
“No, I wish that I was well enough to make you shut up.” She mumbled and shook her head. He could go back to being the silent stalker in the shadows now. She was done trying to justify the way she thought to him. Diggs was trouble, he was pure trouble, “And I wish that you had stayed in Erudite.” That one was more clear as she looked over at him, narrowing her eyes in his direction. Maybe if it wasn’t for him, she wouldn’t be second guessing everything she did...maybe she wouldn’t over think everything.
Logically she agreed with her inner monologue, but her heart was calling for something entirely different. In her heart, there was a part of her ventricles that wished he could be right. She wished that they could live in a world where it was okay for her to be smart and a little courageous...but here she was and a hell of a lot of good it had done her.
Then he answered her about the girl and she found herself holding her breath slightly. As much as she wanted to exploit him for that, she couldn’t imagine losing a ‘the love of her life’ on the jump. Shit. She wasn’t supposed to be sympathizing with him, that wasn’t the play. She could tell the conversation was over even as it just started - he wasn’t going to give her anymore information. Anything else she wanted to know, she would have to find out for herself... “Right.” She breathed, reaching up and rubbing the back of her neck as she pretended as if she wasn’t staring at him. Two days after her death and he hadn’t blown his brains out....interesting, “Sorry.” She muttered - Pay knew she shouldn’t be sorry, but she couldn’t help herself. Stop Talking. Now who was the Mute?
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"I'll love you forever, You live in me. I will be great for you."
16
years old
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Straight
Single
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Initiate
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Mikael
is Offline
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44 posts
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Dauntless
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Post by Colton A. Diggs on Apr 23, 2014 18:02:25 GMT -5
He had expected her outburst, he could tell she had long been happy to conform to the world they were told to live in. Do this, think that and never ask questions. The irony for him was growing up in Erudite where they studied everything and anything, but to theorize or question the factions was off limits. The factions were this almighty, unarguable point in all of their lives and yet, when he thought about it, Diggs despised them. In school he had plenty of friends, most of whom were not in Erudite. He got along with the girls from Amity and the guys from Candor, even some of the Stiffs were cool, but weird but cool. But at the end of the day they were separated by faction, by their clothes and by the desire to be apart of something bigger than themselves.
He heard her wishes and it give him a smile. Back to the petty nonsense, well that was enough serious conversation for him. She didn’t want to hear it and he wasn’t going to continue to rush into a brick wall. But he couldn’t help himself from being a smartass. “Sweetheart, doesn’t matter how well you are. I thought that fresh scar would remind you of that.” He nodded to the knot above her knee, and winked at her. If she wanted to be enemies, constantly bickering instead of seeing that their future involved working together, he would oblige. He enjoyed the game, it kept his mind busy.
His mind wandered back to her hesitation, when he had first spoken about living in a faction he didn’t belong in. During their fight she had taken the time to analyze anything and everything and it made her susceptible to his quick attacks. But it had also led her to get in some key shots when the fight slowed, she had been strategizing, seeing the fight before it happened. Something that he had considered an advantage for him, seeing how he grew up in Erudite and was raised to think that way. She did it naturally, his mind was really beginning to wonder if she was misplaced, but in the end it was her problem, not his and he wasn’t going to waste any more time thinking on it.
His answer was all that he would give, and he was sure that she could tell in his response. He originally thought it to be a mistake to open himself up like that but he assumed most people could tell how much she had meant to him anyway. Why bother hiding it, he wasn’t ashamed. He loved her, and had for a long time, but she was gone now and he had business to attend to now. She responded quickly and seemed to understand. He leaned deeper into his pillow and rested, he assumed that would be it. Then she spoke, barely audible but she spoke. She had apologized. Diggs pushed himself onto his elbows and looked over at her. “Thanks…Payton.”
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You spend hours, days, weeks, months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together.
16
years old
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Straight
Single
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Dauntless-Born Initiate
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Quinn
is Offline
|
48 posts
|
Dauntless
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Post by Payton G. McHale on Apr 28, 2014 12:22:09 GMT -5
Payton looked over at Diggs, just in time to see that he had deliberately winked at her. Rolling her eyes, she was tempted to turn back over, but decided against it as she pointed toward his forehead, “You’re not doing so hot yourself, Mute. Looks like you’re going to have a pretty little battle scar on that head of yours,” She breathed. They would both have scars to remind them of that day - constant reminders of the battle between Transfer and Dauntless-born. The battle that was constantly raging within Patyon’s own head. Her fingertips brushed over the bandaged wound on her leg, wincing ever so slightly. He was right - he had done a good number on her. If she was going to prove herself, she would need some extra help. Maybe she could get one of the instructors to give her some extra lessons...surely that would do the trick.
For a few more moments, Payton just sat there, staring up at the ceiling and watching the fan turning in circles. It spun and spun, rooted to its base so there was no way that it could ever move off its track. Sometimes she wished that her life was that easy. She constantly felt the pressure of remaining rooted and yet here she was, discussing the distinct possibility that she might not belong in Dauntless at all with a relative stranger. She shook her head. Who’re you kidding, Pay? You were born and bred Dauntless. This is probably a mind game. Psych you out. Feel out your weaknesses. He’s trying to get in your head. And it’s working. Her brown eyes flittered over to Digg’s body on the next bed as she narrowed her eyes. It was a convincing game. If she could convince her subconscious that she was right, then she wouldn’t worry about it anymore.
“Don’t-” Payton’s eyes narrowed, as she stared across the beds at Diggs. She didn’t like the way her name sounded on his lips - or maybe she did - maybe that was what had her so freaked out. It seemed so natural the way that he said it, but suddenly she would have felt more comfortable if he had continued to call her sweetheart. It made it easier when they didn’t think about each other in the real context of the world, “Thank me. Seriously. Come tomorrow, I’ll kick your ass.” She rolled over, slightly pouting. More so upset with herself than anything else. There was a certain amount of animosity that seemed to have died down within her with regards to Diggs. This morning she had been intent on killing him on sight and now she had apologized to him? Was she losing her harshness? "That's a promise, Mute."
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"I'll love you forever, You live in me. I will be great for you."
16
years old
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Straight
Single
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Initiate
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Mikael
is Offline
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44 posts
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Dauntless
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Post by Colton A. Diggs on May 5, 2014 22:07:31 GMT -5
Her comment made him chuckle, he knew the scar would come. He was banking on that, a reminder for him to never put his guard down. He had thought that he had beaten her when she had broken his skin with one hell of a hit. He of course responded as only he could, with a knife through her leg. He didn’t like to bleed, or lose, so when pushed against a wall he came out flying. He touched his finger to his scar and smiled at her. “I hear chicks like scars. What do you say sweetheart?” When it came to the scar, he was more worried about how long it would take to heal. They had more fights, ranked fights, in the morning and the last thing he needed was a blatantly obvious weakness glaring from his forehead.
He watched cautiously with his peripheral as she stared up at the ceiling, her mind lost in thought. As he watched her his own mind wandered, wondering about Abby and her test. He spoke to Payton about living in the wrong world, wasn’t that something he was planning on doing for her, did she do that for him? Did she choose Dauntless because that was what he tested into? He didn’t know why she would, he hadn’t told her he had tested Dauntless. Did she just know?
As he tried to thank her, she snapped. Just one word but her eyes narrowed and he knew in true her fashion, only she could dislike a thank you. It felt weird, her name on his lips. Sweetheart seemed so much easier to say, it held so much less consequences. He shook his head and smirked at her, she was unbelievable. He continued to shake his head and then looked at her, no smile, no laughter. “I expect nothing less from you.” He leaned back on his pillow and let a smile cross his face. “7.” He was counting how many sweethearts he owed her, something he wasn’t going to forget shortly. He kept his promises, even to someone like Payton.
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You spend hours, days, weeks, months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together.
16
years old
|
Straight
Single
|
Dauntless-Born Initiate
|
Quinn
is Offline
|
48 posts
|
Dauntless
|
Post by Payton G. McHale on May 18, 2014 21:39:09 GMT -5
Payton watched him carefully as he touched his fingertips to his own wound, undoubtedly realizing that she was right. A nasty scar would follow for the pair of them - something they would have to look at every instant. She rolled her eyes slightly as he smiled in her direction, his playful words seemingly out of place in the air between them. But she found that she didn’t necessarily mind, “I’d say so. Or at least, scars that weren’t given by girls nearly half your size.” She retorted as she continued to watch his fingertips trace the stitched up battle wound before turning over completely so that she wouldn’t have to look at him.
There were a lot of things about Diggs that she still needed to figure out. What was it that made him tick? Where did his weaknesses truly lie? Where did he put his strengths, where did he hide his shortcomings? Payton wanted to analyze him - sit here and ask him every question that was on her mind, but she managed to hold her tongue, turned over and staring at the blank wall of the infirmary. He was the enemy. As much as today had tried to convince her that they were more alike than different, she refused to let the thoughts out of her head. She needed to keep her eyes on the prize or she wasn’t going to make it through Phase One. And that...that was the most important piece of the puzzle right now. She needed to think faster, move quicker and get her fighting up to speed. Maybe then she would have a chance at breaking the top ten like Diggs already had.
He wasn’t defensive when she said that she would be prepared for him tomorrow and she turned slightly on the bed, eyeing him carefully. There was seriousness in his voice, as if it was a challenge. They she would just have to do it. It wasn’t until he leaned back down and stared up at the ceiling that she observed the smile that was on his lips. It almost illicited one of her own - almost. But she pulled the corners of her mouth down in a familiar pout. Struggling to her feet, she swung off the cot and placed her feet onto the floor. Pay moved toward the door just in time to hear him speak a number. A count of how many times he owed her her new sugary-sweet nickname. Another eye-roll from the dark haired girl, “Mute...you do the math. That’s what Erudites are for, right? Crunching numbers.” She breathed as she slammed the door to the medical wing and stalked toward her living quarters. There was no more time she wished to spend with Diggs....at least not while she was sympathizing with him.
notes; sorry this took so long!
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